Here is the Alki Bakery, on Alki Beach in West Seattle.

It's a nice place, even if once a latte served by a teen barista there caused me quick and violent gastric distress.

There are lots of cool posters on the wall inside. See?

They bear news of important cultural events, such as left-leaning plays which mock Republicans,
and various festivals.

Including those having to do with cheese.

The baked goods are quite toothsome; the strawberry lemonade exceptional; the light lunch menu more than serviceable.

There are also crayons for kids, which led to today's epiphany.

Having consumed their cookies and lemonade, my kids were drawing with the crayons.

One of them was white. We wondered: what possible use is this?

Very little, it turns out. We tried it under and over a range of colors, light, medium and dark.

White crayons basically don't show up on dark colors, and make only the most faint alteration when layered under or over any other colored crayon.

Take it from no less an authority than Spidey: white crayons are a real waste of time.

From "Spiderman Reviews Crayons:"

AUGH! Get it away -- get it away! I hate the "White!" White crayons are positively useless! They're only good with black construction paper! Who colors on black construction paper more than once every fifteen years out of sheer pity for the fully unused pile of it collecting inches in the back of a closet? As far as I'm concerned, Crayola's only produced 95 colors. White doesn't count!

Word, arachnid.

Maybe it's all explained by a sort of converse diversity rubric. You know; something like, "Well, we've got black and brown crayons in the set, so just to make sure no one's upset, we'd better have a white one in there, too."

I believe that any 21st Century energy policy should address the waste of raw materials and energy consumed in their manufacture of white crayons.

TECHNORATI TAGS: WHITE CRAYONS, SPIDERMAN, SEATTLE, WEST SEATTLE, ALKI BEACH, ALKI CAFE

Posted by Matt Rosenberg at April 20, 2006 09:21 PM

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