Must be a heckuva major league baseball game, huh? These folks are knitting at Safeco Field, while the Seattle Mariners play.
It was all part of Stitch 'N Pitch Night.
Knitters loved it, just as all identity-based subcultures love recognition from the mainstream. Call me a killjoy, but is MLB really hurting this bad? Maybe I'm spoiled, having grown up attending Cubs games in Chicago's Wrigley Field. Nine seasons out of ten the Cubbies were stinking up the joint, but who cared? The atmosphere and conviviality of the crowd and place were quite enough to keep everyone fully engaged.
And maybe that's it: place. Having been to some games at the Mariners gleaming new facility, it really hits me how antiseptic is the entire experience, how programmed and orchestrated to within an inch of its life. Non-stop announcements on the P.A. system, plus silly contests, incessant promotions, and worse, constantly flashing graphics for the fans, on when and what to cheer. It's as if the guiding philosophy is, "Don't give 'em a minute to sit back and relax, or they'll realize how lifeless this place really is!"
Then, of course, there are the Seattle Stiffs who fill most of the seats, and badly need to attend a ballgame in Chicago, New York or Philadelphia in order to grok what is truly appropriate behavior. Hint: free-flowing beer and shouted insults at the opposing team and the home team's overpaid galoots are essential. The design of Seattle's Safeco Field - which puts most fans at a great distance from the players - doesn't help, and neither do the obscene costs of taking a family to a Mariners game.
So all in all, Stitch 'N Pitch Night was probably a perfect fit for Seattle, ignoring the real issues but appealing to the vanity of a particular demographic, one not usually affirmed by pro sports.
In today's Seattle Times letters to the editor, Peter Fessler of Seattle (last item, here) says he can hardly wait for some other, equally inspired promotional nights at the ol' ballpark.
In light of the recent, um, success of the Mariners' "Pitch 'N Stitch Night" ("M's hit one out of park with a night for knitters," page one, July 29), I'd like to propose the following promotional events at Safeco Field:"Laundry Folding" Night: 10,000 lucky fans get their socks and undies folded by real Mariners players!
"You're The Grounds Crew!" Night: $5 off your ticket price when you rake and water the infield. Perform a stupid dance and receive an extra $5 off.
"No Beer!" Day: The first 25,000 sober fans get to, well, stay sober.
"Tall Guy" Night: All fans taller than the Mariners' Richie Sexon (who's 6'8") get in free. Short people pay double.
"Sleeping Pill" Night: Formerly known as the Mariners vs. the Devil Rays.
See, it's not that hard to do promotions work. I wonder if the Mariners are accepting resumes? If not, they should be.
Some more ideas, all of which will build the team's local audience: Body Piercing Night; Gay, Lesbian and Transgendered Night; Bicycle Messenger Night; Vegan Night; and Republicans Night.
Posted by Matt Rosenberg at August 2, 2005 02:09 PM
Hey, I'd be so there for Republicans night. ;)
The M's really are struggling to put butts in seats this year. Rebuilding years will do that. You do have to wonder what genius came up with stitch and pitch, though.
Posted by: Nathan Azinger at August 2, 2005 05:21 PMThe M's are ranked 11th in attendance through 53 games with a 33,843 average. They were 10th in 2004 with a 36,305 average. The Cubs attract an average of 38,915, the Yanks play before an average of 49,173 and the Phils average 33,232 per game according to ESPN.
How about blogger night?
Posted by: Gary B at August 2, 2005 06:59 PM