From Seattle writer and consultant Matt Rosenberg...

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Walks Like a Duck, Quacks Like a Duck

March 04, 2004

You'd think that Democrats would be smart enough to hold their 2004 national convention somewhere like say, Kansas City, or Dallas. But no, they opted for Boston.

Which prompted Republican former House Majority Leader Dick Armey to say last year, "If I were a Democrat, I would feel a heck of a lot more comfortable in Boston, than say, America."

Now, in the current issue of Boston Magazine, Armey is apolologizing. Except, as the magazine reports, he was essentially correct. Boston is very different. The magazine researched the matter and found that:

...Bostonians are more likely to have university educations, are far more likely to have Ph.Ds, are more likely to read daily newspapers, make more money, buy more books, listen to more classical music, have the highest attendance rates at cultural events, own fewer guns, are less likely to be obese or smoke cigarettes, are more likely to work out, and are less likely to shop at Wal-Mart.

In other words, they're effete liberal fops, with no comprehension whatever of essential stuff like barbeque, Merle Travis, and target practice.

Armey was right the first time around.

Posted by Matt Rosenberg at March 4, 2004 07:48 AM


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Comments:

How exactly can one live without barbeque? For high culture, nothing beats tending the Weber wielding a barbeque tool in one hand and a glass of cab in the other. I'm partial to Aussie reds.

Posted by: Gary B at March 4, 2004 08:25 AM

Anyone calling Bostonians effete fops hasn't tried to drive here in rush hour or dealt with a Noreaster.
Sitting out on your patio in your nice fake suburban home barbecuing with a glass of wine in your hand? Now that I call foppish.

Oh,and the reason why there's more people likely to have university educations here is because there's alot of universities in the city. Duh.
And we own fewer guns cuz we'd rather fight like real men, with our fists.
Come visit sometime, you'll get eaten alive.

Posted by: Jack Spratt at March 4, 2004 08:50 AM

Gee Jack, that hurts. Time for another glass. Apparently, Boston and Toronto lack a sense of humor.

Posted by: Gary B at March 4, 2004 02:25 PM

Way to stalk buddy.
:)
Keep up the good work.

Posted by: Jack Spratt at March 5, 2004 05:04 AM

Oh, and a cab? Cabs are so 1999.
While stalking trolls on the internet, you really should drink a nice Australian Shiraz. For you I recommend some Yellowtail. They're right in your price range, say around $7 a bottle. I mean this only as friendly advice, although it may hurt your sensitive feelings once again. If so I humbly apologize. ;)

Posted by: Jack Spratt at March 5, 2004 05:34 AM

Wow! You sure put me in my place. All of your wisdom and advice is certainly appreciated.

Posted by: Gary B at March 5, 2004 07:36 AM

Anytime buddy! Glad to know you didn't take it the wrong way this time.
:)

Posted by: Jack Spratt at March 5, 2004 08:06 AM

Jack,

You're much funnier with invective.

Posted by: Gary B at March 5, 2004 08:31 AM

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